Affordable Mediation Is Growing As An Option To Expensive Divorce Court

Divorce mediation is all about you and your soon-to-be-ex decided how your own divorce will go. It is also a growing methodology used to work through outstanding issues in a non-adversarial way to the two of you can end your marriage and amicably — and cost effective — as possible.

The Top issues usually covered include:

  • Distribution of Property
  • Child Custody and Visitation
  • Child Support
  • Retirement, and
  • Taxes

During the process, the couple with the guidance of a mediator, work out agreements on these issues. Often an agreement is easy to reach. Other times the road is long and winding. It is up to the mediator to keep communication open, brainstorm ideas and give the couple a reality check. Mediators work to keep the couple focused on the issues and keep them on track. When couples go off the rails and stray from the main issues, arguing, name-calling and bad memories surface.

As mediation is flexible and confidential, you and your partner are helped to settle a conflict so that a continued relationship can continue as parents. Lack of communication can be one of the original reasons for diverse and mediation can help the couple to re-learn basic skills if only for the children’s sake.


As a divorce mediator is neutral and doesn’t ‘work’ for either party, the mediator cannot give advice to either side. They must remain neutral — no matter how heated the conversation may get.

The mediator can assist the couple in forming ideas which may eventually lead to lasting agreements. As both parties are working with the same foundation of information, it often takes less time to negotiate a resolution which makes sense to everyone involved.


As mediation is voluntary, the process continues for as long as all three parties, you, your spouse and the mediator, want it to work. Sessions with the mediator may be conducted weekly, every two weeks or monthly. The frequency can be greater if the couple desires. Mediation is for the couple and they jointly decide everything while moving through the process.

The length depends on the issues agreed prior to the start of mediation. The amount of time spent depends on the couple willingness to come to agreements equitable for both and the best interests of the children. Time spend in mediation may be reduced if terms can be reached prior to mediation or at least the options are narrowed down. If both parties are not able to discuss the divorce outside of mediation, observers recommend the process be avoided. When couples attempt to iron out issues on their own and it leads to arguments and drawing lines in the sand, mediation can be more difficult.

The Takeaway

Divorce in the court system is public domain. Anyone can visit the court and hear the specifics. Mediation is confidential, private and is conducted behind closed doors.

Mediation is about working together and focusing on being able to lay the foundation for the best life to come.

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